American crime series

 

Theres a lot of American crimes series on telly right now, the funny thing though is they mostly seem to fall into to different camps.

 Theres the true crime type where usually a middle aged woman with hair lacquered to the consistency of plywood follows a real life murder story.  These while interesting are so cringeworthy and sad make me want to reach for the sick bags.  

 Lets face it, asking the parent of a murdered child questions like " how did you feel when you found your 12 year old daughters multiple stabbed lifeless body?"  This said with the presenters rictus grin as she tries to look sad and smile for the camera at the same time to show off her impossible white teeth.

 Lets face it love, how the hell do you think they felt?  I doubt they were jumping up and down with joy you silly plastic haired moron.

 Then we come to the drama type series like Criminal minds (sadly now finished)  Sometimes these are really good, more recently though they've become pretty sad and boring.

 I suspect the real problem is they now rely on special effects and not good acting and story.  Take an impossibly good looking group of FBI agents, throw in a few big CGI explosions, a dememted serial killer (note it has to be either a demented serial killer or a terrorist, it's never a bloke selling timeshares he doesn't own) Throw in a car chase, usually very short and your agents will have the case closed in 42 minutes (less adverts)  And bingo you have a winning formular for those whoes IQ is smaller than their shoe size.

 Factor in that most serial killers are not visually demented and actually are usually very normal in appearence and that the real FBI claim theres on average about 50 actually operating in the US at any one time and you get the impression that far from catching them in 42 minutes most never get caught at all.

 Indeed Samual Little was active for around 40 years not 40 minutes, and it wasn't after a dramatic car chase and a few explosions he was caught, oh no, he got picked up for a drugs charge and a routine DNA test pinged one of his murders dating back to 1987, although he'd started long before that claiming around 93 victimes (the police have confirmed a large number of these)

  So next time you watch your dashing bronzed hero kick down a perps door shouting "FBI show me you hands" remember the truth is the real cop is eating a doughnut and trying to figure out how to start his own car.