Why is it....

 Why is it people who have only ever had a provisional driving licence and haven't sat behind the wheel in years always think they know the best place to park my car? I mean I only drive it every day.
 I was reversing into a perfectly good parking space the other day when "oh theres a better space over there", then another comment from the other doesn't drive person, "theres a space next to that yellow car there" so over we go out of the perfectly good space I was already in and yes there is a space next to the yellow car. And it's four foot too fucking short for my car.  Thats why I drove past it on my way to the perfectly good space I was in. I know how big my car is!
 Then I get "what about over there theres plenty of space there" so over there we go.  Yes there is plenty of space.  Thats because this is the bloody coach park, and theres only one coach in it.  Sadly it's a hundred yards further away from the fucking space I started with and I'm not driving a fucking coach.
 Mind I wasn't surprised.. 
 You see I'd looked through the glass things cars have (they are called windows) and I'd seen it was a coach park when I FUCKING drove past it on the way in!
 So back to the perfectly good space I was in to bloody start with, all you've done is waste my time and petrol by trying to be clever and tell me how to drive something you cant drive.
 So heres a hot tip, next time I'm parking MY car if I don't ask for advice SHUT THE FUCK UP!!! and leave me alone.  I really do know best... and I'm the one with a bloody LICENCE.