Oh Smeg!

 I've just come home with my son from getting food and there is what appears to be a giant Banana outside next doors house.  I can see it but my son say's he can't.
 This raises two possibilites.  One, it's there and he's telling fibs... Or.  Two, it's not actually there and I'm seeing bloody giant bananas... Which makes me.... Well bananas I suppose...   Oh Smeg!

A few more pics

 I went out with my son last night we went to see if we could spot the beast (or whatever I saw) again.  Now I have had one sighting since, but that was a HUGE fox, seriously it was bloody massive.  So wether thats what I saw the first time and mis-identified or not I don't know.  I still think what I saw was a big cat.

 Anyway heres a few pics.

Two photos.

 Heres two pics.  Not much else to say.

The Phantom sock snatcher part two

 Note to self.  Booby-trapping a sock is a great idea unless you have a bad memory....  Limps off stage right...

The Phantom Sock Snatcher of Ye Olde London town...

 The phantom sock snatcher of Ye olde London town.  No it's not a Goon show title, it's a bloody pain in the arse.   Ok, I don't actually live in Ye Olde London town, but the bloody sock snatcher is real enough.
 Someone-something is taking socks in our house, it's not my son, his socks are going missing too. It's not the dog becuse we haven't got one, that leaves the phantom... or something else......  

The Beast of Baglan

 Now I know over the years I've posted a few.... Errr, lets be kind and say suspect pictures....  But just for a minute I'm being serious here.
 I'd been out shooting some video in the woods near where I live, I'd run the battery out in the video camera and was making my way back home just before sunset. Walking down the track I see what looks like a bit black Labrador in front of me, maybe 70 or 80 yards away.  Now I didn't take too much notice, it's common to see dog walkers about there, I expected someone to come around the bend behind it.
 Thats when it got weird, the "dog" turned side on and I could see it was a cat, a big cat, it ran into the overgrown wood's on my right (it had crossed left to right) I didn't see any signs of it when I got to the spot it had crossed the track.
 Now I cane all the way home without seeing another person, so no dog walker, and I've never seen an unaccompanied dog there anyway.  Besides I'd got a reasonable look at it and it was definitely a cat of some sort.  
 It was big and dark coloured, either black or dark brown, and moved like a cat.
 Now over the years theres been a number of sighting, this is the first time I've seen anything like it.
 Like I said at the start, I'm being serious here, I know roughly where it crossed the track and roughly the time, when I get chance I'm going to go back and stake out the spot, just in case it's got a regular route.

Man V's 2015 (film review)

"As host of his own hit TV series, 'MAN VS', Doug Woods is forced to fend for himself for five days in remote locations with no crew, food, or water, only the cameras he carries on his back to film his experiences. Doug's in the remote woods for a routine episode, until he's awoken by an earth-shaking crash. Things get weirder as it becomes clear Doug isn't alone. Someone or something is watching him. MAN VS is a gripping 'found footage' thriller about one man's extraordinary desire to survive at all costs." IMDb

 Something different here, we've all see the "found footage" Blair Witch type films before, and they've been done to death frankly.  This is a bit different.

 The film is a sort of Survivorman (Les Stroud) or maybe a bit Bear Grylls type person goes out alone with just his cameras for a week alone in the woods making a survival program.  Strange things start happening, noises, things moving, just weird stuff, then it gets serious.  I'm not going to give too much away here.
 Doug Woods played by Chris Diamantopoulos does a good job of more or less carrying the film with a pretty much one man performance, ok there are other cast but they play a fairly minor part of the movie.

 The locations are great, the special effects let it down a bit by being a bit "Ray Harryhausen" giving the feel they are stop motions annimation, but the film does a good job of keeping you wondering what exactly is going on and who or what is Doug up against.

All in all I enjoyed it.

Waynes rating 7.5/10  Worth a watch

Finding Bigfoot (supernatural bigfoot)

 OMG!  WTF!  Well not Finding Bigfoot reached a new low this week. 
 Combining a team of paranormal investigators and the Finding Bigfoot team they ask the question is bigfoot a ghost, or trans-dimensional being or even an alien.
 Never have I heard so much utter bollocks spouted by people claiming to be investigators.  Theres a woman who speaks Sasquatch (no honestly I kid you not)  Then theres a medium that can speak to bigfoot and get them to answer questions (curiously they understand English) Theres a bloke in a cave who goes into the Sasquatch alien underground base in a volcano (in his mind)  I thought it was only Bond villains that lived in secret lairs in volcano's but hey you live and learn.
 Seriously it was terrible, total rubbish, if this is the way the series is going the cast better start looking for day jobs.

Water (pictures)

 We went up the waterfalls yesterday, got a few pics.

Toothpaste

After making my self a fry up this morning I went for a scrub and then started cleaning my teeth, that was until the toothpaste ran out, not a big deal, I had bought a new tube yesterday ready.  At least it shouldn't have been a big deal, that was until I tried opening it.  you see in their infinite wisdom the toothpaste manufacture had decided that their toothpaste was so deadly it needed a safety system to protect the public.
 Yep you guessed it, five minutes struggling with wet hands and my few remaining teeth removerd the stupid pointless safety cap. 
 FFS how dangerous can toothpaste be?

Sesame seed crackers

I bought some sesame seed crackers today by mistake for french toast.  How to recreate the taste of a sesame seed cracker.  Buy some polystyrene ceiling tiles, cut into circles and eat (don't actually eat them for heavens sake) But I now know what eating a ceiling tile tasts like... Crap!

The law is a bit silly if not quite an ass.

 Unless you've been dead you'll have seen on the news the fuss about a British celebrity who's partner has had a threesome, the person can't be named or for that matter one of the other people involved in the threesome can't even name them self, despite the fact they were the one who told the press.  If they publish their own name they are in contempt of court and face jail. 
 The reason is simple, one of the people involved has obtained an injunction.
 What makes it silly is despite not even being able to name his/her self in the UK, the names of all the parties concerned can be published abroad freely.
 I fail to see the logic here, I don't know what century the judge lives in but it doesn't appear to be the same twenty first century I'm in.  I have things like tv and the internet, I can read papers from all over the world, I can see news from all over the world.  Why a celebrity and two judges think British people wont find out who the people concerned are when they can be named abroad (and even in Scotland) is baffling.  I mean do they really think people wont find out?  The secrecy actually makes it worst, I couldn't care less about some celeb having a threesome (what goes on in your house is your business) but once I was told British people can't be told I was dead courious. 
 You know what I live in Britain and it took me all of 30 seconds to find out who it was, now I'm not daft enough to name them here, the laws the law and contempt of court is a serious thing.  But you know what, I have a lot less respect for the people concerned for trying to cover this up, not because of the threesome bit. because they are stupid enough to think British people wont find out who they are.

Farm yard

 Long story short I ended up at a farm the other day, I only had my old camera and a short lens so I got a few pics of the animals, could have done with a longer lens but it is what it is.

Time. (rant!)

 Why does everything take so bloody long, seriously.  Why!
 Today the plumber was coming to fix a badly leaking tap, it's a five minute job for a competent plumber, so they told me it'll be between 8 and 3.30, bit of a pain to hang about but the water is pouring out of the tap so we are turning the water off at the stop tap in case.  At 2.30 they ring up and say he cant come now as he's got his hand stuck in a soil pipe.  WTF?  What kind of plumber gets his hand stuck in a bloody pipe, and do I want him "fixing" a leaky tap in my house.
 So as someone else is now coming this evening I nipped out to pick up my prescription from the surgery and pop it in the chemist, while I'm at the surgery I get my mothers magazines and 2 slices of ham for tea.  How long will that take, half hour?  40 minutes maybe?  No, I takes a fucking hour and a half.
 First off there was a twat parked in the middle of the road dropping someone off, 5 minutes of my life gone due to a brainless prick.  Then another 5 minutes just getting into the car park by the surgery as theres another moron who cant drive blocking the whole place up while they look up reverse gear in the cars handbook.
 Then the surgery itself... Well nobody in reception (surprise surprise)  the reason it's called fucking reception is because your supposed to receive people, having them wait while you piss about in the back room with a cuppa and a muffin is not receiving people.
 So then off to the chemist... what could go wrong here... well quite a lot actually, first I wait... and wait some more, then after waiting a bit longer he gives me my perscription, I get home to find 3 boxes of tables I've never seen before. Another half hour on the phone and I find out the consultant has decided I need these after my recent blood test (still had a bit of blood left) Of course no bastard could be bothered to actually go so far as to tell me, or tell me what they are for, luckly for me I happen know what these tables are for, and I know I probably shouldn't be taking them with my other tablets... So now I'm still trying to talk to someone marginally higher up the food chain than the laboratory test rat and find out if it's bloody ssfe for me to take them.  Silly fuckers.